Showgirls 2: Miss Twin Peaks

Showgirls (1995) Starring Elizabeth Berkley, Kyle MacLachlan

LAST SEEN: Nomi pulling a knife and screaming “I want my f-king suitcase!” These are good ways to encourage a safe and pleasant hitchhiking experience.

OPENS WITH: A shot of the Hollywood sign, and a pan down to Kyle MacLachlan reprising his role as Zack Carey. The former casino boss has been investigating Nomi’s disappearance for the past 25 err 23 years. He’s got a hot tip that she’s in L.A. and the happy go lucky Zack is there to track her down.

He canvasses the obvious places where she might be. Nail Salons. Pools. Versace. Doggy Chow store.

Frustrated, he wanders into a diner and orders. The Pointer Sisters’ “I’m so Excited” is playing on the jukebox. He muses aloud “This is damn good brown rice and vegetables.”

He shows a picture of Nomi to the waitress. She shakes her head. Never seen her.

Laura Dern slides next to him at the counter. “You looking for Nomi?”

“You know her?”

“Yeah. Low self esteem but a fantastic f-ck.”

“How can I get a hold of her?”

“Always going on and on about being the next Paula Abdul.”

“Yes – that’s her. Where can I find her?”

“She liked rubbing her nipples with ice,” Laura Dern stares into the distance.

“That’s right. Now, where is she?”

“She dared anyone who doubted she had her period to check.”

“Ok. That’s weird but….”

“She was warned. She was warned several times that doing that kind of work could kill her.”

“What kind of work? Oh no. Did she get AIDS and sh!t?”

“No. Worse. Caffeine Pills. She was so. Scared.”

THE END


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