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Happy Gilmore 2: Happy vs. Tiger Woods

Happy Gilmore (1996) Starring Still Funny Adam Sandler

LAST SEEN:  Saving Grandma from Zoolander and landscape duty.

OPENS WITH:  A shot of beautiful Torrey Pines Golf Course, Sunday, January 28, 2018.  Happy Gilmore is expected to win again at the Farmers Insurance Open.

Happy sees the wind blow and senses a change.  He turns around to see former World Number 1 Player Tiger Woods doing his bull dance, feeling the flow, working it.

Happy yells profanities at his large and economically diverse fans as they abandon him in droves to watch Tiger instead.

Happy takes a poop on the green.  Even that doesn’t detract from Tiger’s media attention.

“What about me?!”  Happy screams.  He was right to be angry.  The entire telecast is focused on Tiger’s big return.

Happy waits until Tiger’s backswing and yells, “Get in the hole!”  Distracted, Tiger misses.

Tiger’s fans turn into an angry mob:

“Get that moron out here!”

“You’re an idiot. Go home!”

“This is him, the idiot!”

“Get the f*ck out of here, man.”

Happy is overwhelmed.  “I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry!” he repeats.

“You should beat his as$!”

“That’s what we should do!”

Happy walks away screaming “Damn you people. Go back to your shanties!”

He hears the ghost of Chubbs in his head “What are you doing Happy? Heckling a Tiger? You’re acting like a damn fool!”

Happy says to no one in particular, “It ain’t over, Tiger Woods. The way I see it… we’ve only just begun.”

A slow fade to black as Happy walks up to Tiger’s car with his golf club…


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